My One-hundred-and-ninety-ninth Post

So as many of you know, my little sister Faybe got married a year ago.

Yep, that's her and her hubby. This week she told me that she's pregnant. This is exciting news, of course. It also means that 3 out of 3 of my married siblings are having babies in 2010 (and 0/3 of my unmarried siblings are, for the record). Congrats, you guys.

But it seems my family are not the only ones obsessed with babies in 2010. Does anyone else find the concept of the upcoming movie Babies a little disturbing?



It pretty much just documents the lives of four babies for their first year of life. So the audience can see how cute they are. That's basically it. The title pretty much says it all. Weird.

My One-hundred-and-ninety-eighth Post

After our family moved to Tucson, Faybe and I always shared a room together. It made complete sense logistically to group us together, and we never had many major line-down-the-middle-of-the-room problems, aside from her strange affinity for a 101 Dalmatians poster that I could not abide.



We stuck together until Martin moved out and Faybe claimed her own little cave of a room on the opposite side of the house. Which was fine--we were both glad to have our own space for some of those dramatic teenage years.

After she moved out, my mom and I began a summer-long remodel of what was now my room. We pulled out the brown speckled shag carpet and laid wood floors. We stripped the popcorn off the ceiling and replastered it. We put up base boards and moulding. We planned and painted and decorated. It turned out pretty nice, if I do say so myself.

But here's the thing. When I come home to visit I stay in the same room I've slept in since I was 11, but it is not the room of my childhood. It's different. And sometimes I wish I could go back to visit. I miss that gross shag carpet and that stupid poster. I miss staying up talking with Faybe until we drifted off listening to my cassette tape collection.



But when all is said and done, I supposed I'm grateful for the big, soft, fluffy bed (which I'm currently stretch out across). It makes reminiscing so comfortable. The squeaky twin bed of yore would be much less conducive to my nostalgia.

My One-hundred-and-ninety-seventh Post

For the last several weeks I've been trying to come up with something clever to say about the similarities in names of

Rob Pattinson:

and Pat Robertson:


I mean, there's got to be a pun or a play on words or something in there. Right?

No? To much of a stretch?

My One-hundred-and-ninety-sixth Post

Many food blogs have recipes recommendations at the bottom of their posts. These can be similar food items, complimentary menu ideas, or sometimes throw backs (recipes that were featured on the same day in years pasts, for example). I like this concept, because it gives me pointed direction into the archives of a site that might otherwise be overwhelming.

Our Best Bites is one of my favorite food blogs. I frequent a lot of these types of blogs, but this one just speaks to me. The thing is, I can't figure out for the life of me how they determine their end-of-post recommendations. I was looking at a recipe for breadsticks today, and this was at the end:


Um, this cracks me up. None of these recipes is logically connected to breadsticks: they're not bread recipes, general baking recipes, Italian recipes, or even basic side dish recipes. So, I might like these suggestions based on... what criteria, exactly? That I appear to be a carbon-based lifeform that likes food? "Mangoes" isn't even a recipe! It's an ingredient!

The widget the site is using is LinkWithin, which claims it will help you "link to related stories from your blog archive." Methinks it still needs some work, though

My One-hundred-and-ninety-fifth Post

International titles of the television show Growing Pains, translated:

China: The Frustrations of Growing Up
Taiwan: Happy Family
France: What Is New, Doctor?
Germany: Our Loud Home
Italy: Parents In Blue Jeans
Japan: Happy Seaver's Family
Latin America: Ouch! How Painful Is Growing Up
Poland: Our Kids, Trouble and Us
Spain: The Problems Grow
Sweden: Dad Knows Best

My One-hundred-and-ninety-fourth Post

So the clock on my computer likes to do this weird thing. It kind of just keeps adding new numbers on top of the old ones instead of replacing them. Like this:



Isn't that amusing? I think that deserves a blog post all by itself.

I'm to lazy to look it up / fix my clock most of the time, so I often don't know what time it is while I'm on my computer. It's easiest just to ask someone else. I've recently started asking who ever I'm chatting with about the time. Most people just tell me, but some people are mean about it. People like my sister Martin.

Martin: Get a watch.
Me: :| But I have a computer, which is awesomer.
Martin: But apparently can't tell you the time.
Me: Did I :| you yet?
Martin: Yes?
Me: I don't think I did.
Me: :|

My One-hundred-and-ninety-third Post

Things my sister Martin has promised if I move in with her after I graduate (compiled by searching our chat history for the phrases "if you lived here," "if you lived with me," "if you moved to Phoenix," etc):

• She will no longer be the de facto favorite sister/aunt just because she lives significantly closer to the family than I do.
• She will watch any past, current, or future Terminator movies with me.
• She will always have pie for me.
• She will let me use her Blu-Ray player, giant TV, and StarGate Blu-Ray any time I want.
• She will give me her laptop.
• She will let me get a puppy or kitty.
• She will let me make chicken noodle soup for her.
• She will let me scare off her friends by alienating them with threatening text messages.
• She will eat my baked goods.
• She will bake me chocolate round cake, with strawberries in the middle.
• She will expect me to keep cake in the house at all times.
• She will make sure my birthday is way cooler than it has been in Provo (metaphorically, not temperature-wise).
  
• She will buy me a couch that I can keep in her dining room.
• She will not protect my stuffed squirrel army from her cats.
• She will switch to a 2 bedroom apartment.
• She will not allow any of my stuff out of my room because it will clash with her "pretty decor".
• She will buy a fancy set of cookware.
• She will share her pumpkin spice cake with me.
• She will visit me from work.
• She will let me live with her rent free if I kill any scorpions we encounter.
• She will provide me with tortillas
• She will write scary limericks on her food to warn me not to eat it.
• She will provide me with peaches.
• She will take me to the grocery store or, realistically, give me her car keys.
• She will hide all the good food in her closet.
• She will play with me except during homework time and actual work time. Mostly just for a few hours in the evening and on weekends.
• She will support me / let me mooch off her.
• She will never have to throw away her Australian liquorice.
• She will let me eat ice cream for dinner every day.
• She will help me conduct a controlled study to compare the ice cream experience of Provo with that of Phoenix.
• She will feed me black beans, rice, chicken, salsa, corn, cheese, and sour cream.
• She will have instant access to my DVD collection and vice versa.

Many of them involve food, which is fairly indicative of our relationship, I think. Some of these are incentives to move there, and some are deterrents. Some of them are bizarre and can not rightly be classified as a incentive or deterrent. Also, some are contradictory.

What do you think? Should I accept her proposal? Or wait and see what else she's willing to offer?

My One-hundred-and-ninety-second Post

So I dyed my hair blonde last night...



But I think something went wrong.

My One-hundred-and-ninety-first Post

Pictures of Everything: Installment 5

Holy crap! How did they do that?

My One-hundred-and-ninetieth Post

10 tips for having fun at the movies

1. Know your companion: Are you going with a date? A friend? A group of people? Giggley girls? [Your mom!] These are important factors to be aware of.
   
2. Pick your movie wisely: It doesn't have to be a great movie, but it does need to be something that piques your interest. Also take into account your companions: if they're not fans of scary movies, don't make them go to one unless you're prepared to leave with fingernail marks imprinted in your arm. If your friends are movie snobs, stay away from the generic preteen movies. (Save them for others who will appreciate them more--like me!) If you know you're just going to talk or make fun of it the whole time, wait until it's been out for a few weeks so those who want to take it seriously will have their chance (or at least go to a really late showing so you'll disturb fewer people).
3. Bring a sweater and a big purse: Movie theaters can get really cold, and unless you want an excuse to snuggle up to your companion, come prepared. And the bag is an important preparation to for the next step.
4. Go to a gas station or grocery store: Making this quick stop will save you a ton of money when it comes to concessions. Pick out whatever junk food strikes your fancy. It's important to have a good balance between sugary/salty and fruity/chocolatey treats. Don't forget drinks! I always grab a water bottle even if I'm also getting a juice or soda. Be sure to try something new! One of the best discoveries I ever made came from grabbing something randomly off the shelf: Toffifay! Just make sure you have enough room to smuggle everything in: don't let your eyes get bigger than your pockets! [Bonus! Buy Pop Rocks to eat during the car chase or the magical transformation scene. Anything's better with Pop Rocks]
   
5. Get there ahead of time: Though the previews are an important part of the experience, even more critical here is your seat selection. Getting there early lets you have more choices and ensure you can sit together. I like to get center seats that are far enough back that I don't have to turn my head to see the whole screen at once. Plus you'll have a chance to talk with your companion a bit before the show!
6. Silence your cell phone: Don't forget (like you could with all the "friendly" reminders), and don't just put it on vibrate. Even a vibrating phone can still distract you (at best) or might even drag you down into the despicable sin of texting during a movie (at worst). The only exception to this rule is if you're a mom with a babysitter at home--then vibrate is acceptable.
   
7. Be courteous: Make sure you have fun, but don't interfere with the experience of others. The golden rule absolutely applies in movie theaters. If people keep shooting you dirty looks you should knock off what ever it is you're doing. Seriously. Right now. I will cuht you. And maybe call sekhurity.
   
8. Don't ever leave early: This is why step 2 is so important. If you know you're the type to get squeamish or easily offended, don't go to movies that make you squirm and wince. Once you've paid for the movie, you might as well see it through to the end. It will give you resolution so at least you won't wonder for the rest of your life if the end could possibly be as bad as the beginning. Sometimes movies surprise you, and that's a good thing. If nothing else, it's rude to your companions to deny them that resolution, even if you don't think you need it.
9. Don't bolt: Stay through the first 3 minutes of credits, at least. It will give you time to digest the ending and evaluate how you feel about the film as a whole. Also, since you got their early enough to get good seats, you're probably sitting in the middle. If you wait until after the mass exodus of people from the theater, you won't have to climb over and trample people to get out. The only vaild exception is if you really need to use the restroom--then get out as soon as you can because there will be a line. There's always a line.
   
10. Pick up after yourself: It takes you very little effort to toss your cups and wrappers on the way out of the theater. Do the cleaning crew this small service: I can't imagine its fun to pick up after slobs.

My One-hundred-and-eighty-ninth Post

This image was on The Daily Universe's front page this morning. Shortly after I picked one up, they pulled all copies of it from campus. I wonder why.

My One-hundred-and-eighty-eighth Post

Okay, sometimes I wonder about some of the pictures I have saved on my computer. For example:



Did I go through some phase where I was obsessed with old-timey children's television programs? And I just... don't remember? Was it a project I was working on? I couldn't have been that important if I have no memory of it. OR. Or this could be some cryptic message I left for myself before having my memory erased to protect those I love from the horrors that the encoded information might bring forth? But why did I leave some clue to it behind? Maybe... maybe it is important. WHY DID I SAVE THESE? This is going to drive me insane.

My One-hundred-and-eighty-seventh Post

A few random tidbits of info I've been collecting:

• Did you know that in yeast breads, the role of sugar is to promote yeast growth, while salt's role is to control it.
• A better synonym of "condone" is "overlook" rather than "support," as many think.
  
• Botanically speaking, the banana is a herb. Also, try to work the phrase "botanically speaking" into your next conversation. Fun times.
• There are four types of marriages: monogamy, polygyny/polygymy, polyandry, and group marriage. (Monogamy is one wife, one husband. Polygyny is one husband, several wives. Polyandry is one wife, several husbands. Group marriage is self explanatory, I think)

My One-hundred-and-eighty-sixth Post

Just a note. If you visit my actual blog, you will notice I have added a "shared items" thing to the sidebar. I sort through a ton of blog posts everyday and share with you the cream of the crop--pretty much things that make me giggle and occasionally things that make me think. If you are Google-friends with me (awesome!), you are probably already bombarded by my shared posts in your Google Reader (seriously feel free to block me if they annoy you). But if you're not and you want to be, you can view (and subscribe to) my shared items here. Which I thought was pretty neat.


(PS! LOOK WHAT I DID WITH THE GRAPHIC! I AM SO FUNNY!)

My One-hundred-and-eighty-fourth Post

Cereal is the best thing ever.

My One-hundred-and-eighty-fifth Post

I've been wanting to mention my new favorite comic, Daisy Owl. The main characters are Mr. Owl (an owl), his two adopted (human) children Daisy and Cooper, and his (bear) friend Steve. They get into all sorts of hijinks. I'm trying to pick a few favorites to share, but it's difficult because I have too many favorites to chose from!

Let's start with these (click to see original):




Additionally, we have the simple truth of board games, the kidnapping of Mr. Owl, the stuffy monkey saga, worries about raising kids, misconceptions, pie problems, wardrobe malfunctions, The Princess Bride, and depressing educational info. Really you should just start from the beginning and read them all!

And the best part? Alt text!

My One-hundred-and-eighty-third Post

po·seur \pō-ˈzər, ˈpō-zər\: a person who pretends to be what he or she is not : an affected or insincere person




Is it possible I am a big fat poseur? I think everyone is to some degree. But I have been trying to figure out my own style. I think for the most part I can tell if I don't like something, but when it comes to liking v. ambivalence, I have a hard time making the call. I'm afraid that I want things so that other people will see them and think I am SO COOL for liking them. What if someday I'm left alone with all my stuff, and I look around, and realize I hate it all?