Saturday, May 08, 2010

The Grand Old Duke of York.

I'm searching for a job right now. It is a frustrating process, but I think I've pinned down exactly what the problem is: too much hope.

I've been looking at a lot of help-wanted listings, and sorting out the positions for which I am qualified. Then I thin those down to just the ones I'm actually willing to do (and I don't think I'm being especially picky here--the biggest issue is location/commute).

During this vetting process each week, I usually turn up a few leads. With the good ones, I start to get a little excited. I imagine getting up every morning and going to these jobs. And I convince myself I am exactly what they're looking for.

I envision myself working there, and earning a paycheck. And I see myself engaging in frivolous behavior like buying things, and building my savings, and affording health insurance. And on this natural high of possibility and opportunity, I make calls of inquiry, and fill out applications, and set up interviews.

And wait.

And then I get turned down, or ignored, or passed over.

Which kind of sucks.
And for a while I think, no other job can be as perfect as that one would have been.

But then some new listing piques my interest, and the vicious cycle starts again. This would be a lot easier if I were less invested in the jobs I apply for. But then, the trade-off would be long-term misery when I finally get hired by them.




So I guess I choose this method for now. Doesn't mean I have to like it.