My One-hundred-and-fifty-fifth Post

A few weeks ago, Martin and I were watching video clips from The Onion's "News" Network. We especially found this one amusing, in which China celebrates its pollution levels being so high. Apparently, lots of pollution means lots of technological advancement.

"The labor of the people has made the sky black with the smoke of progress"

So I was taking a quiz on recent news headlines, and since I was chatting with Martin at the time, I shared it with her.

Me: I'm taking a quiz, and one of the questions reminds me of the Onion clip on China. "China has been revealed as the world's biggest polluter, in an authoritative report to be published next month. Which country has it overtaken?"
Martin: Tibet
Me: Um, no. The US.
Martin: China has overtaken the US?

Yes, Martin. China is now in control of the US. I guess I'd better brush up on my Mandarin. Hen Gao Xing Yu Xian Ni.

(This is a good example of how you can answer a question correctly, but still be completely and utterly wrong.)

My One-hundred-and-fifty-fourth Post

Pictures of Everything: Installment 1

I have a folder on my computer entitled "pictures of everything." I have a lot of random and amusing things saved there. But, after tucking them away in this folder, they often never manage to resurface. So I've decided to occasionally post one on my blog. Here is the first one:

My One-hundred-and-fifty-third Post

I too have caught the gardening bug. This is probably because I made the mistake of accompanying Uffish on a midnight WalMarket run to obtain very important items such as "milk" and "hose." The hose search lead us back into the gardening area, and I decided I needed more green in my life. Unfortunately, I have a bit of a black thumb when it comes to growing things, so I was really hoping for something already alive that I could kill off by the end of the summer. But while we were attempting to drag Uffish away from the seeds (I think she ended up buying 6 more kinds of seeds and a tomato plant in addition to all the stuff she already has), I noticed a small packet of mint seeds. Herbs could be fun, and they are supposedly fairly easy to work with! So I got mint, sweet basil, and parsley seeds. I also got a cute little pot to grow them in. I have decided to call them Minnie, Bailey, and Pops. Maybe I should have postponed naming them, because it will be very sad if they don't grow at all.


Also, I went to The Sconecutter this morning to... um... buy scones. It has a surprisingly diverse menu including scones, scone breakfast sandwiches, scone sandwiches, sconenuts (like donuts, but with scones), dessert scones, and curly fries. Its drive-thru is open 24-hrs, so if you're hankering for some good ol' fashioned fried dough, give 'em a try any time of day. Also, the scones are huge, so unless you have at least 3 people, do not order the 6 pack of scones.

My One-hundred-and-fifty-second Post

Many of you expressed excitment when I mentioned my upcoming post What’s Wrong With the World (Installment 4). Well, this is not it. I did several of the graphics for it, but I'm just not feeling it right now. Plus, I'm kind of blogged out after completely revamping my family's blog for spring. Instead, you get an accounting of my activities for the last 60 hours.

My One-hundred-and-fifty-first Post

I really like doing crosswords. I can usually only solve the Monday and Tuesday puzzles, but that doesn't keep me from trying the harder ones when I have a few spare minutes. Sometimes I find those spare minutes while I'm on a break at work. I can scribble in a few answers, and then I usually leave it unfinished on a table somewhere. Sometimes when I come back to it, a few more answers have been written in by other aspiring crossword enthusiasts. Yesterday a friend joined me on break and we were able to completely finish one. When we came to the last few clues, I didn't even realize we were at the end. It was just good, clean fun. Tee hee.



Emily Cureton does drawings inspired by the NYT crossword puzzle. This is the sketch from the one we did yesterday.

My One-hundred-and-fiftieth Post

Martin and I talked on the phone for 45 minutes today. And considering that neither one of us likes talking on the phone, I think that means she likes me.

My One-hundred-and-forty-ninth Post

I took private voice lessons from my choir teacher in high school. At one of our first lessons, he was telling me that practice was important, and I should probably be doing formal vocal exercises every day. Then he said “Of course, I know I’m probably preaching to the choir.” Then there was a short pause, so I gravely nodded my head, indicating that I understood the importance of practice. Then we continued on with the lesson.

It wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I got that he was making a joke. He was my choir teacher. He was literally preaching to the choir. Ha!








And now, a Star Trek reference:

Data: I get it! "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to leave!" I get it!
Geordi: Data, what do you get?
Data: The Farpoint mission! You told a joke; that was the punchline!
Geordi: The Farpoint mission? Data, that was seven years ago.
Data: I know! I finally get it! Very funny!

My One-hundred-and-forty-eighth Post

I just made Jello cups.

I made them all on my very own without stealing them from invalids, or showing up at a little league soccer match, or conjuring them out of mid-air, or buying them. I did none of those things!

See, I've had this box of raspberry Jello forever: it just seemed like something good to have on hand. But every time I'm in the mood for Jello, I am NOT in the mood to wait four hours for Jello. But I finally made it this afternoon when I had the brilliant idea to split the Jello up into smaller containers so it would set up faster! Woo-hoo! (I was originally going to follow the fast set-up recipe, but we didn't have any ice.)

So in searching for appropriate containers, I happened to come across a bunch of little tupperware containers that I never use because they are too small to be practical (about 1/2 cup each). I mixed up the Jello, divided it among the little containers and popped them in the fridge. A few hours later, I had magical individual Jello cups...



...and a fridge shelf covered in Jello goo that had leaked. If you ever decide to try this, consider not putting the lids on until after the Jello has set up.

Also, substitute Sprite or 7UP for the cold water in the recipe. Your life'll never be the same.

My One-hundred-and-forty-seventh Post

So I spent last weekend with my sister, Martin.

Martin was moving apartments (mainly because she has a deathly fear of scorpions, which tended to be overly friendly at her old apartment), and I jokingly committed to come and help her with all the heavy lifting. I make these offers all the time, and when she confronts me about not showing up, I present her with an excuse about hitchhiking, or train derailments, or some other type of disaster which prevented me from fulfilling my commitment. But this time, due to a combination of mild homesickness and cheap airfare, I actually ended up going out there for three whole days! Yay!

Several other members of my family drove up to help as well, and it was a good thing too, because Martin is a wimp when it comes to moving heavy objects. My sister Mean Mommy and I ended up doing quite a bit of the hard work, mainly to prevent my Dad from hurting himself trying to do it. And to give you an idea of how some of the moving went, I have provided you with this rare archival footage:



Yeah.

So anyway, I ended up having many other fun adventures like going to IKEA for the first time, sleeping with a cat curled up on my face, using my engineering prowess to assemble lamps and bookshelves and swivel-y chairs, convincing Martin that she really did need to be able to see the TV from the kitchen, mistakingly using shampoo instead of hair gel, and lots, lots more!

It was a good weekend, and I've spend the last several days trying to catch up on everything from sleep to work to school stuff. But it was totally worth it.

Hooray for spontaneity.

My One-hundred-and-forty-sixth Post

I've recently relized that I own a lot of TV on DVD (also that I always write "realise" instead of "realize," and have to go back and change it every time). I don't really watch it as much as I think I should, considering that I own them. I've been trying to cycle through my television series recently to justify owning them. But sometimes I just want something new.

TV seasons I own:

• The West Wing (1-7)
• Alias (1-5)
• House, MD (1-3)
• Pete and Pete (1-2)
• Firefly (1)
• How I Met Your Mother (1)
• Lois and Clark Adventures (1)
• Grey's Anatomy (2)
• Arrested Development (3)
• Gilmore Girls (various pirated disks from 1-3)

PS- I'm mostly posting this to annoy my sister Martin, who thinks I should be blogging about my weekend with her.