Hiking.

So a while ago, Martin mentioned that we should go hiking sometime. I agreed, but the Arizona summer made it kind of impractical until just recently. Mostly because in July and August, the temperature jumps to 100 degrees the second the sun comes up.

But now it's cool enough in the wee hours of the morning that you can actually go outside without melting. You have until about 10 o'clock in the morning before you get back up into the 90s.

So I started looking. I looked high and low. But mostly online. I had high standards. A local hiking venue with established, clearly marked trails. It was a tall order, but I was committed to making this work. I did the research. I planned it all out.

But when I told Martin about it, she just stared at me blankly. "I didn't think you understand how this works," she sneered. "I suggest things, and we feel good about ourselves for our good intentions. Then we move on. I. Don't. Do. Things." Then she turned on her heel and made to storm off.

"Wait just a minute," I commanded. She froze at the tone of my voice. After all my awesome research, I wasn't willing to just let this go. "Be ready by 6:45 Saturday morning," I instructed. "We're doing this."


Now, once we got out on the trail I discovered something. I had assumed that since I am woefully out of shape, I would be the one holding us back. But as it turns out, Martin is a big fat baby. But we pulled each other through.

At one point we thought we had missed our turn off, and that we would be adding an extra three miles to our four mile hike. But just as we started looking for the second turn off, we found the first one... proving that we have absolutely no concept of distance. Like, at all.

In conclusion, we saw some nice views, we got awesome nice sun burns, and learned that we are nice hikers. Not very good at it, but still pretty nice.



Martin looked sick, stoned, or annoyed in all the pictures of her. So you get two of me instead. You are welcome, Internet.